European Tour: The Dream Come True
Being on tour is a dream for most musicians, to do a tour into Europe is another ball game… total dream overload.
The Elephant in the Room… The Distance!
I have been lucky enough to have recently completed my second European tour with HausKatt F.K.A The Pagans S.O.H and our good friends, The Battery Farm. And let me tell you, there was a lot for naive me to learn, fast! First of all, lets just clarify that I love touring, and in fact despite what I am about to say I really love it. So now here come the brutal truths of touring, that were, lets say, not really considered thoroughly prior to me leaving.
Travelling is brutal enough in the U.K. for those Plymouth Argyle or Sunderland fans out there, you know the pain. But when I say Germanh is fucking huge, it is absolutely ginormous! The constant barrage of ‘ausfahrt’ signs greeting us on the autobahn, gradually over time grains on you, becoming a main topic in your LSD-style bad trip as you descend into the abyss of a time loop. You check the sat-nat after a long surprising sleep, only to discover that the screen displays literal numerological hell as you read that there are still eight hours left of your journey. Your supply of savoury goods withers at an alarming pace, as you gather the remaining crumbs out of yet another tube of Pringles. Shaking flavours you knew were long gone; the road psychosis sets in!
It is important for me to get these, rather unfortunate truths out of the way first before I sell you on why Europe is one of the greatest places for a band to play. But quite possibly my worst experience of travel on tour took place not on the fresh tarmac of the autobahn, but rather the open sea. I am just going to say this, DO NOT GET THE FERRY. Honestly, when I set off on my maiden voyage across to Europe, I thought the travel time would be anywhere from two to four hours at worst.
Eight. Hours.
Surrounded by nothing but choppy grey seas and overcast skies. I spent most of my time trying not to fall over, get seasick and doing my very best not to lose my mind trying to find where the sea starts and the sky ends.
Priceless Joy
Now, you’re probably thinking why on earth would I even bother putting myself through all this trouble and discomfort? Well, it is simple. The crowds are fucking wild! Seriously, this is no disrespect to a U.K. crowd, but our Euro neighbours go hard. I believe though it comes down to a simple fact, that the U.K. arts industries are criminally underfunded and cared about by parliament. A complete disregard if I am honest now I have experienced how life could be for independent musicians. Speaking with a fan at our Hilversum show in the Netherlands, I asked about how much money Dutch residents can get for theory work. And he said three thousand euros. Now, the U.K. claims to pay out from one thousand to one hundred thousand pounds, I haven’t heard of anyone as an up-and-coming artist getting three grand though. Not independently at least!
So now the good stuff about touring, obviously being able to travel is beautiful and expands the mind. But meeting new people, experiencing different cultures and drinking that sweet German beer. Oh lord, it is divine. I suspect European countries have more money pumped into the arts, as venues have strong followings and promoters have more money to pay bands too. Often, young bands have to barter with promoters to not pay-to-play, now this isn’t all promoters but in Europe, all the people we came across were down to earth and treated us with respect. It often feels like people pity me when I tell them I am a musician, but over that great grey sea, we were treated with respect and dignity. A combination of qualities that some promoters are void of ever being able to possess when dealing with bands. We got paid three hundred euros for a gig in Schwerin, Germany. Plus, Steiny (owner of The Scotsman Bar) put us up in the Marriot! Oh and those German hotels, even the cheaper ones were clean and smelt like roses. Talk about an upgrade from the travel lodge. Only in some parts of France and the Netherlands did we see rubbish, and only in the cities. And of course, these countries all come with their own problems and issues in their society, but I feel there is a much better quality of life over there. Especially Germany and the Netherlands.
Berlin
We experienced East Berlin as we played in the depths of the district, we entered the city limits and are welcomed by run-down buildings, rubbish piled up and potholes in the roads. I am convinced that the only potholes in Germany are in East Berlin! We felt empathy for the residents, as the conditions were concerning. Myself and the band were overwhelmed by the heavy vibe in the air, perhaps this being supported by the impending political vote that occurred the following day. We were wondering where all the people were, or at least if there are any happy people there at all. But as soon as the clock struck 7.30 and the doors opened, the crowds followed! It all made sense to me that moment, this is a party city. And the drinks followed! It is inspiring to see such a thriving creative scene in a city that has had its fair share of negative energy enveloping its borders.
I urge all bands to experience this, warts and all. As the experience of a European venue packed out for your band, is special. Extra special shoutout to Hillyweird in Hilversum for providing the most vibrant scene and crazed crowd from the bunch. And it was a wild bunch!
